“Tell
me about the nightmares.” Dr. Raimer, the occupational health
psychologist, rested his chin on his hands, as he waited patiently
for her answer.
Yvonne
sighed. She resented being here. This was the second of the psych
sessions she had agreed to, in order to be allowed back to work. She
felt that she'd worked through the traumatic experience of the
sadist, herself, and didn't need help from others, but it was true
that she was suffering terrifying nightmares.
“Any
involving the sadist?” Raimer prompted gently.
She
shook her head, “no.” Her gaze moved to the window behind
Raimer, it was raining hard. Her eyes glazed over, hazing the
streaks, which were running down the glass, “I dream of tornadoes a lot.”
“Tornadoes?”
“Big,
black clouds approaching me. They're spinning, developing spirals,
which reach for the ground. I know they are coming for me and the
people I care about.”
“Do
you wake up then?”
“Sometimes.”
“What
happens when you don't wake up.”
“They
take me up, or if I'm driving, they lift the car.”
“Do you feel afraid?”
“The
strange thing is that, at first, I almost like it. I'm flying and I
can see a long way. I can see everything.”
“And
then?”
“I'm
too high up. Far, far too high. I know that when the tornado has
finished with me, I'm going to fall a very long way...I'm going to
die.”
“You
mentioned the tornadoes coming for people you care about.”
“Yes,
sometimes I'm not the one under threat. I know it's coming for my
family, or friends, and I am frantic, trying to get them to go to
safety. I'm running to warn them. Those are the most terrifying
nightmares.”
“What
about frequency?”
Yvonne
looked back at the psychologist, “frequency?”
“Are
the nightmares becoming less frequent?”
“No...I
don't know...I was having nightmares long before the sadist.”
“After
David?”
Yvonne's
eyes became shiny, betraying the tears only barely held back.
“Yes.”
She swallowed hard.
“You've
been on your own for quite a while now. It's not a bad thing, you
know, to reach out to others. Do you think you may have been closing
yourself off?”
“Yes...no...I
don't know, maybe.”
“And
now you have a new case. A new killer.”
“Yes.”
“Are
you really ready for that?”
Yvonne
snorted, “oh don't worry, doctor, I'm being given the kid gloves
treatment.” Her brow was furrowed and her breathing slow.
“DCI
Matthews?”
“He's
watching my every move.”
“You
can understand why...”
Yvonne was feeling raw. She was glad the session would soon be at a close. Raimer
could see into her and she found the whole experience uncomfortable.
He was always too close to the mark. She nodded and glanced at the
clock, her signal to him that she wanted the session to end.
“I'd
like to see you again in 3 weeks.” His voice was firm.
“Yes,
doctor.” She said the words softly, but had no intention of
following through.